The final hour of 2016 approaches and finds me at my computer, ready to sort through this past year and think ahead to the next, all in 80 minutes...
New Years' Eve seems to have arrived on silent cat feet this year. No warning, and so fast! I don't really feel ready for the change. Or maybe its that I don't WANT the year to change. For so many, 2016 was a sad, difficult year. For our family (notable exception of the 2016 election results aside), 2016 was easy and comfortable. We were blessed with health and constancy, and our cups overflowed with vacations and travel and time with friends. Making our photo book this year was an acute reminder of just how good we've had it.
I'd rather not see any of that change, thankyouverymuch.
As I look ahead to the transition in our government in 20 short days, and all of the possible disasters that may unfold thereafter, I can't help but feel that 2017 is not going to be an improvement. And so it is hard to muster any jubilation tonight. We did attend a cozy little party with our friends, Melinda's traditional "New Toddler's Eve" celebration, but absent a few of our regular guests it was a low key affair, with all of the guests over the age of 10 sharing the same apprehension for the year to come. We didn't talk much about it, just drank cherry cosmos and danced in the disco lights with our children and watched the OSU game, soaking up the normalcy of these last hours of the last year in which we are able to rest easy as a nation under strong and competent leadership.
Yet, try as I might, I cannot stop the world from turning these last 70 minutes towards a new year.
And so I look forward. Resolutions right now seem so very vital- and so hard to determine. Reading over posts from past years-- I am working on so many of the same goals, still (aren't we all?) and it is tempting to simply copy-paste and try again.. But this year, in the new world yet to unfold, there is new work to do. I always struggle to find balance and fit in all the living and working and growing I want to do. I am daunted by the prospect of adding political resistance and activism to the mix. I am hoping I can use my resolutions to help me find the right path forward.
1. Pare down. I want to add more to my life so I will need to remove what I can. I will work to pare my spending down to what is essential, pare my possessions down to what is useful or beautiful, pare my eating down to foods that feed my body well. Most challenging, I will need to pare my commitments and activities down to those that are necessary for life or good for my soul. I know I will not achieve this resolution this year. Or perhaps, ever. But I want to get closer. And I feel like this is really important right now, so that I can focus on the work ahead...
2. Choose love. In a world where fear is rampant, I will seek ways to combat it with love and kindness. I will find ways to be kind to others and develop connections, particularly within my own community. I will work towards being an ally for friends and neighbors in marginalized groups. I will face my own white privilege so that I can move beyond it.
3. Seek hope. I will practice gratitude and notice joy, and use joy and hope to guide me towards the best ways to use my time. I will not be paralyzed by fear or pessimism. I will create an atmosphere of hope and and optimism for my children. I will look to them for inspiration. I will seek the company of others who are hopeful too. I will need to be more aware than ever of politics and news, and I will need hope to help balance my heart.
4. Use intention. I want to create memorable days and so I will need to intentionally seek out new experiences for my family. I want to be more in control of my finances and so I will need to spend money intentionally and thoughtfully and only in ways that will enrich my life or the lives of those I love. I want to use my time to help the world and so I will choose groups and causes with intention, where I can use my skills and surround myself with people who inspire me to create change. I want to perpetuate kindness and so I will choose my words with intention.
Because I am a special education teacher, I need some measureable goals to go with all these broad dreams. Some concrete goals for 2017:
*Get passports for the kids. So we can go to Niagara falls, or emigrate if needed. I will not be paralyzed by fear but neither will I be complacent! Seek hope, use intention.
*Continue getting in shape so that I can be strong and ready for the future, as measured by losing 5-10 more pounds. Pare down, use intention.
*Visit at least 5 friends/family within driving distance--"oh, we should really go see..." I want to just go SEE them this year. Choose love, and create memorable days.
*Find ONE new political/activism group or project I can engage with meaningfully. Seek hope, use intention.
*Read a book instead of going on Facebook, at least one time per day. I think this will help with my intentionality. And really, larger world aside, I am tired of being that person who is always on her phone. So, baby steps.
Wish me luck. Wish us all luck. Here we go.
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