Interesting word, that.
Re- solution. To find the solution, again.
Appropo, then, that we try again and again to solve everything, every year, with plans and dreams and promises and resolutions.
It is December 31st, 10:17 pm, and it's time for my annual trip down that road of resolve.
I've learned this year from my Thirty Days experience that small steps are powerful, that positives are easier than negatives, and that I can only add do much to my life at any one time.
And so with that in mind, I will greet 2012:
1. Be Mindful. Of what I put in my body, of what I do with time, of what I say to my children.
2. Be Patient. With my children, with the pace of life, with myself. Know that change starts small and change takes time.
3. Be Grateful. See and feel and know the blessings in my life every moment of every day. The blessing of life itself.
4. Be present. Focus on the now, this moment. Let the past rest, let the future unfold. Plan for it, prepare for it, wonder at it, and let it be. Be.
I think that's it.
Happy New Year, all. May it unfold beautifully and with joy.
Saturday, December 31, 2011
Friday, December 2, 2011
December 2
So.
Anything for 30 days is not quite as easy as one might think, apparently.
I kind of fell off the wagon in November. I blame 2 weeks of plague upon our house followed by the onset of the holiday season with its ensuing company, cooking, and cleaning.
Only one thing to do when you fall off the wagon: Get back on.
I had a birthday a couple of days ago. Thirty-five, which seems kind of impossible to me. The pace of life flying by is astonishing and numbing and humbling. And it brings into absolute clarity the need to savor, to drink up, to love it all.
And to thank people.
There's this lovely technology-age tradition that's sprung up-- the Facebook birthday greeting. Facebook reminds you that it's someone's birthday, you click their name and write a quick note on their wall, people feel loved. It's really pretty wonderful, and very efficient. Generally, the birthday-ee closes the day with an artfully worded post thanking their friends for the well-wishes, and that's that.
My birthday fell on a Wednesday this year and seeing as Wednesday is pretty much the longest day of the week for me, I wasn't anticipating a very festive day. But then I awoke at 5am to lovely homemade cards from my family and a surprising number of wall posts on Facebook, and the day was suddenly off to a lovely start.
As I drove to the gym I vowed that I would thank each and every person who had taken the time, unbidden, to wish me a happy birthday. Thank them personally, and meaningfully; bring a bit of light and warmth to their day too.
I began to regret that choice as the day went by and the birthday wishes rolled in.
By evening I had over 50 people to respond to. It took me almost an hour follow through on my vow.
It was one of the most worthwhile hours I've spent in a long, long time.
Looking at each person's picture, name; thinking about them and how they have affected my life. Reading over their page to catch up on their lives, really thinking about their posts and not just skimming. Writing a genuine compliment for them, telling them, directly, what I love about them, why I am glad they are my friend.
This new virtual world of ours, thrilling in its immediacy, its connectivity, tempts us to skim the surface, to rush through life, rush past people, skip ahead to what's next. Efficient, exciting, instant.
It takes time to go deeper, to slow down and dig past the virtual and find the real. These people, these real people, these friends. Technology has reconnected me to many and I am so very grateful to it. But I need to remember that a quick pause for real gratitude, a moment taken for real connection, is what allows me to use the technology to add to my life, rather than the other way around....
Plus, you should have seen all the comments I got back.
You get out what you put in.
And this December, I will be trying to put in more. I will be using technology to add real connection to my life, to help me savor and appreciate the people who make my life rich and beautiful.
Every day I will try to send an e-mail, write a message or post a comment that will make someone's day. I will use my words to deepen connections. I will use the virtual to strengthen the real.
Anything for 30 days is not quite as easy as one might think, apparently.
I kind of fell off the wagon in November. I blame 2 weeks of plague upon our house followed by the onset of the holiday season with its ensuing company, cooking, and cleaning.
Only one thing to do when you fall off the wagon: Get back on.
I had a birthday a couple of days ago. Thirty-five, which seems kind of impossible to me. The pace of life flying by is astonishing and numbing and humbling. And it brings into absolute clarity the need to savor, to drink up, to love it all.
And to thank people.
There's this lovely technology-age tradition that's sprung up-- the Facebook birthday greeting. Facebook reminds you that it's someone's birthday, you click their name and write a quick note on their wall, people feel loved. It's really pretty wonderful, and very efficient. Generally, the birthday-ee closes the day with an artfully worded post thanking their friends for the well-wishes, and that's that.
My birthday fell on a Wednesday this year and seeing as Wednesday is pretty much the longest day of the week for me, I wasn't anticipating a very festive day. But then I awoke at 5am to lovely homemade cards from my family and a surprising number of wall posts on Facebook, and the day was suddenly off to a lovely start.
As I drove to the gym I vowed that I would thank each and every person who had taken the time, unbidden, to wish me a happy birthday. Thank them personally, and meaningfully; bring a bit of light and warmth to their day too.
I began to regret that choice as the day went by and the birthday wishes rolled in.
By evening I had over 50 people to respond to. It took me almost an hour follow through on my vow.
It was one of the most worthwhile hours I've spent in a long, long time.
Looking at each person's picture, name; thinking about them and how they have affected my life. Reading over their page to catch up on their lives, really thinking about their posts and not just skimming. Writing a genuine compliment for them, telling them, directly, what I love about them, why I am glad they are my friend.
This new virtual world of ours, thrilling in its immediacy, its connectivity, tempts us to skim the surface, to rush through life, rush past people, skip ahead to what's next. Efficient, exciting, instant.
It takes time to go deeper, to slow down and dig past the virtual and find the real. These people, these real people, these friends. Technology has reconnected me to many and I am so very grateful to it. But I need to remember that a quick pause for real gratitude, a moment taken for real connection, is what allows me to use the technology to add to my life, rather than the other way around....
Plus, you should have seen all the comments I got back.
You get out what you put in.
And this December, I will be trying to put in more. I will be using technology to add real connection to my life, to help me savor and appreciate the people who make my life rich and beautiful.
Every day I will try to send an e-mail, write a message or post a comment that will make someone's day. I will use my words to deepen connections. I will use the virtual to strengthen the real.
Saturday, November 19, 2011
November 19
We've enjoyed ourselves a sick day today. A good, old fashioned one.
Poor little Jack-man got hit by that same Mack truck last night, on the way back home from Legacy Village in fact. In the car. Good times.
Moments like last night make me feel like I am really not cut out for this parenthood stuff.
Spent today making up for it.
We huddled close to home all day to let the boy recuperate, and to take it easy on ourselves, too, as both Nat and I are pitiful coughing, voiceless things. It turns out, we don't usually do that-- just stay home.
It was a long day.
Not a bad day, all told; no more puking after about 1am, and both kids were pretty happy all day. But today certainly tested the limits of how long one can play aimlessly with a collection of three Bakugan at a 4-year-old's request. God love them, my children are sweet and loving and very amusing-- yet I am glad that most days allow me to enjoy them in settings beyond the walls of the playroom. It did feel good, though, to know that I was giving them my undivided attention for such extended periods of time, no outside commitments or schedules or plans to interrupt us. They deserve that more often. They're very good little children.
That said, we did have a wonderful walk around our neighborhood this morning, wherein we enjoyed the best 30 minutes of the day, weatherwise, and collected pinecones. We also went to Target, where we purchased a Christmas tree. We bit the bullet and upgraded our artificial tree, to use this year when we plan to be out of town over Christmas. Sigh. The box is in our living room and I have to admit, I can see how people get caught up in the obscenely-early Christmas start-up. I kind of want to set it up right now. It's over there, calling to me with its promise of lights and magic and warmth and memory, that box of plastic greenery.
But I shall wait. At least until next weekend. Because Thanksgiving is in 5 days, can you believe it. I plan to be grateful that we are all healthy again.
Poor little Jack-man got hit by that same Mack truck last night, on the way back home from Legacy Village in fact. In the car. Good times.
Moments like last night make me feel like I am really not cut out for this parenthood stuff.
Spent today making up for it.
We huddled close to home all day to let the boy recuperate, and to take it easy on ourselves, too, as both Nat and I are pitiful coughing, voiceless things. It turns out, we don't usually do that-- just stay home.
It was a long day.
Not a bad day, all told; no more puking after about 1am, and both kids were pretty happy all day. But today certainly tested the limits of how long one can play aimlessly with a collection of three Bakugan at a 4-year-old's request. God love them, my children are sweet and loving and very amusing-- yet I am glad that most days allow me to enjoy them in settings beyond the walls of the playroom. It did feel good, though, to know that I was giving them my undivided attention for such extended periods of time, no outside commitments or schedules or plans to interrupt us. They deserve that more often. They're very good little children.
That said, we did have a wonderful walk around our neighborhood this morning, wherein we enjoyed the best 30 minutes of the day, weatherwise, and collected pinecones. We also went to Target, where we purchased a Christmas tree. We bit the bullet and upgraded our artificial tree, to use this year when we plan to be out of town over Christmas. Sigh. The box is in our living room and I have to admit, I can see how people get caught up in the obscenely-early Christmas start-up. I kind of want to set it up right now. It's over there, calling to me with its promise of lights and magic and warmth and memory, that box of plastic greenery.
But I shall wait. At least until next weekend. Because Thanksgiving is in 5 days, can you believe it. I plan to be grateful that we are all healthy again.
Thursday, November 17, 2011
November 17
I've been a bad blogger. Or at least, a sick one. Shortly after enjoying that nice, normal Monday, I was hit by the Mack-truck of illness and was down for the count for a good 36 hours. Feeling much better today, thank you.
Today I am happy that a sore throat and nagging cough, by comparison, don't seem so bad.
One silver lining to a bout with stomach flu: no worries about overindulging on the sweets for the past few days, that's for sure. I'm going to try to get my behind to the gym tomorrow if only for a quick weigh-in...
I think my musings on sweetness this evening may cross over entirely into the zone of my children, so hop over to Mommy's Blog (see, About the Kids, at right) for a scintillating recount of the things my little darlings say and do...
Today I am happy that a sore throat and nagging cough, by comparison, don't seem so bad.
One silver lining to a bout with stomach flu: no worries about overindulging on the sweets for the past few days, that's for sure. I'm going to try to get my behind to the gym tomorrow if only for a quick weigh-in...
I think my musings on sweetness this evening may cross over entirely into the zone of my children, so hop over to Mommy's Blog (see, About the Kids, at right) for a scintillating recount of the things my little darlings say and do...
Monday, November 14, 2011
November 14
Today:
Rainy.
Warm.
Ordinary.
Monday.
To be celebrated for its normalcy more than anything. A quiet day at work, a quiet evening at home. Not too much water in the basement after the storm.
The icing on the cake today-- Ivy's giggle and prancing dance, and her obsession with hats. Jack sitting quietly paging through books, "reading the pictures." Making the most of my double planning time, and a math meeting that was nigh-tolerable.
The blessings of an ordinary life. Off to bed early to keep the good thing going...
Rainy.
Warm.
Ordinary.
Monday.
To be celebrated for its normalcy more than anything. A quiet day at work, a quiet evening at home. Not too much water in the basement after the storm.
The icing on the cake today-- Ivy's giggle and prancing dance, and her obsession with hats. Jack sitting quietly paging through books, "reading the pictures." Making the most of my double planning time, and a math meeting that was nigh-tolerable.
The blessings of an ordinary life. Off to bed early to keep the good thing going...
Sunday, November 13, 2011
November 13
What a wonderful weekend. What wonderful weather. Kind, balmy days. Crisp piles of leaves dancing across the sidewalks. A happy boy who is finally feeling better from his week of malaise.
And today-- gatherings of friends galore: A birthday party for Jack's preschool friend Scarlett, Second Sunday Soup, and dinner swap...
Much sweetness to celebrate (along with some to eat-- homemade apple crisp and cookies from Corbo's bakery? how could I not?)...
This morning, a wonderful walk in our neighborhood; a trip to the park that turned into a ramble along the edge of the gully, and then exploring down to the stream, the quiet of grand old trees and English ivy everywhere.
A relaxing morning with the Sunday paper and children who played quietly together, off and on. A clean house and time to play with my boy.
The chance to meet and bond with some other preschool parents, while enjoying the antics of 17 children dashing through a birthday party. The looks on the 4 year old faces as they held their "freeze" poses during the games; Ivy joining the dancing; children crowding around the couch, closer and closer as the presents were opened...
A small, warm gathering for Second Sunday Soup-- we all fit (sort of) around a table! Candles lit and conversation and wine and desserts; children drawing in the living room, playing in the yard, shrieks of laughter abounding.
Ending the evening with an hour and half spent with the dinner swap crew. Tea and cookies and the talking-over-one-another conversation born of familiarity. Delicious all around.
Our little faux-fire is burning cheerily away, and four candles still flicker in the wall sconce. The dog is snoring next to me on the couch, and the laundry is folded all around us. I am not in a hurry to go to bed...
And today-- gatherings of friends galore: A birthday party for Jack's preschool friend Scarlett, Second Sunday Soup, and dinner swap...
Much sweetness to celebrate (along with some to eat-- homemade apple crisp and cookies from Corbo's bakery? how could I not?)...
This morning, a wonderful walk in our neighborhood; a trip to the park that turned into a ramble along the edge of the gully, and then exploring down to the stream, the quiet of grand old trees and English ivy everywhere.
A relaxing morning with the Sunday paper and children who played quietly together, off and on. A clean house and time to play with my boy.
The chance to meet and bond with some other preschool parents, while enjoying the antics of 17 children dashing through a birthday party. The looks on the 4 year old faces as they held their "freeze" poses during the games; Ivy joining the dancing; children crowding around the couch, closer and closer as the presents were opened...
A small, warm gathering for Second Sunday Soup-- we all fit (sort of) around a table! Candles lit and conversation and wine and desserts; children drawing in the living room, playing in the yard, shrieks of laughter abounding.
Ending the evening with an hour and half spent with the dinner swap crew. Tea and cookies and the talking-over-one-another conversation born of familiarity. Delicious all around.
Our little faux-fire is burning cheerily away, and four candles still flicker in the wall sconce. The dog is snoring next to me on the couch, and the laundry is folded all around us. I am not in a hurry to go to bed...
Thursday, November 10, 2011
November 10
Tomorrow is 11-11-11. We are eagerly anticipating jumping 11 times at 11:11.
Why not?
I look forward to this eagerly despite that fact that Nat is upstairs soothing a sobbing boy with a slight fever and raging case of conjunctivitis.
I continue to stand firmly on my new resolution, which is shifting slightly to be: "I refuse to let life get in the way of enjoying life!"
So there.
Long day all told, for everyone. Nat had 13 hours of shepherding the dynamic, and 1/2 snotty, duo around the town, while I spent that time juggling a nonstop day and 3 hours of very chatty parents at conferences.
The sweetness of today was hidden in little nooks. Like Nat's stolen moments with a snuggly boy in our bed for 20 minutes this morning. The upside of a sick boy.
A Chipotle dinner provided by our PTA, enjoyed hurriedly in the lounge at 3:45, a brief splash of camaraderie to brighten the afternoon.
Happy smiles on the faces of parents reporting their child's pride in bringing home a wonderful report card, rejoicing in progress, saying their child looks forward to school. The reward that goes so much beyond a salary.
The promise of a half day at school and a resale event in the afternoon tomorrow.
Life is good. See?
Why not?
I look forward to this eagerly despite that fact that Nat is upstairs soothing a sobbing boy with a slight fever and raging case of conjunctivitis.
I continue to stand firmly on my new resolution, which is shifting slightly to be: "I refuse to let life get in the way of enjoying life!"
So there.
Long day all told, for everyone. Nat had 13 hours of shepherding the dynamic, and 1/2 snotty, duo around the town, while I spent that time juggling a nonstop day and 3 hours of very chatty parents at conferences.
The sweetness of today was hidden in little nooks. Like Nat's stolen moments with a snuggly boy in our bed for 20 minutes this morning. The upside of a sick boy.
A Chipotle dinner provided by our PTA, enjoyed hurriedly in the lounge at 3:45, a brief splash of camaraderie to brighten the afternoon.
Happy smiles on the faces of parents reporting their child's pride in bringing home a wonderful report card, rejoicing in progress, saying their child looks forward to school. The reward that goes so much beyond a salary.
The promise of a half day at school and a resale event in the afternoon tomorrow.
Life is good. See?
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